Interview 1: Thomas
On my way to interview my friend, the different tactics of a reflexive dyadic interview began to circulate in my thoughts. I was nervous because it wasn't a typical 'Q&A" interview and I wasn't used it. Neither was he. I began by asking him a general question to get the interview going but he was taken aback when I began inputting my own stories. I told him it wasn't formal so he could become more comfortable with the style of interview. I pulled out main questions throughout the interview and condensed it below. I was generally surprised at his responses.
I began the interview with a general question. "To finally live in America, the land of opportunities, which 'opportunity' was stressed most often by your parents?"
"They stressed the importance of education because not everyone was able to attend school in China." replied Thomas.
"Oh that's how it was for my mom. She kept saying 'education is your foundation; with a foundation, nothing can be supported in the later processes.'. She also wanted me to speak Vietnamese when I was at home. Was it important for you to learn Chinese? Or did your parents think English was more important to learn?"
"They wanted me to know both because heritage is important, but I'm not fluent in Chinese."
"Well if they stressed the importance of both languages, why aren't you as fluent in Chinese?"
"It was harder to learn. Also, I didn't want to be forced into learning it."
"Oh I understand. My mother used to bring me to the temple to learn how to speak and write in Vietnamese. I dreaded those three hours but I feel like it definitely paid off when I went to actually visit Viet Nam, you know?"
"Yeah, I wish I could speak Chinese, especially when I visit China. It sucks to not be able to talk to my grandmother or uncles."
At this point, I could hear the hurt of having this barrier of communication between his grandmother, a woman whom his father would talk so much about. His voice broke when he spoke of this inability to talk to them. I tried to shy away from this sadness but I still wanted to know more on the language struggle because it was evocative and emotional. I decided to ask him if he wanted to learn Chinese (to possibly break this barrier).
"Would you have any interests in learning Chinese in the future?"
"I believe learning is a life-long process and if I found the chance to learn conversational Chinese, I would. Writing is way too hard."
"Yes! I totally understand. Writing Chinese is practically writing hieroglyphics!" After some laughter, I continued on the conversation with a different subtopic. "I have family in Asia too, specifically Viet Nam. With other first generation Asians, I've had a similar background to theirs. I was wondering what was your parents', as well as your, story?"
"After finishing undergrad in China, my parents came to get their PhD in America. My mother went to Baylor and my father went to UMass. My mother was a nurse before she came to America. She had influences from her father, an army medic. My dad came from an impoverished home and was very lucky to go to America to finish schooling. My father constantly feels guilty to live in America while his brothers and mother are stuck in China so he visits often and sends money to subsidize costs. I have visited China a few times with my parents. Both of my parents speak fluent English but they speak both Chinese and English at home."
"My mom has a similar story as your father's. She definitely came from an impoverished family. She was working in rice fields when her older sisters went to school and they would alternate every other day. My mother was allowed to go to America because her father was a GI during the Vietnam War, but her older sisters weren't so lucky to have this opportunity so my mother tries her best to help them out. Because my mother had such a rough life, she definitely stresses hard work and taking advantage of all these resources in America. How do the values instilled in you by your parents differ from those of your American friends?"
"There is a huge emphasis on working hard because my dad came from an impoverish past and didn't have many opportunities; therefore, I should use as many opportunities as I can. There is also an emphasis on the children taking care of the parents. My dad is constantly worrying on his family back in China. I should return the same gratitude as he, as well as my mother, has provided so much for me. If my parents were born in America, they wouldn't have as strong a work ethic as they do now."
I know it's a ways away, but when you have children, will you stress the same values?"
"It's very important to remember your roots, your heritage, and where you came from. It's good to let your children know where your ancestors came from. I would be a lot different if my parents were born in America. I don't speak Chinese well but if I could redo my childhood, I would learn how to speak the language to communicate with my family back in China."
I thanked him for his time and went straight to my dorm to type up this enlightening interview. Each first generation child has parents that came to the States in search of this American Dream but everyone's journey, despite some similarities, are so different. My mom came here because she was able to escape the back-breaking labor and restart and gain a better life. Thomas's parents came to continue a greater education to have a better life.
I began the interview with a general question. "To finally live in America, the land of opportunities, which 'opportunity' was stressed most often by your parents?"
"They stressed the importance of education because not everyone was able to attend school in China." replied Thomas.
"Oh that's how it was for my mom. She kept saying 'education is your foundation; with a foundation, nothing can be supported in the later processes.'. She also wanted me to speak Vietnamese when I was at home. Was it important for you to learn Chinese? Or did your parents think English was more important to learn?"
"They wanted me to know both because heritage is important, but I'm not fluent in Chinese."
"Well if they stressed the importance of both languages, why aren't you as fluent in Chinese?"
"It was harder to learn. Also, I didn't want to be forced into learning it."
"Oh I understand. My mother used to bring me to the temple to learn how to speak and write in Vietnamese. I dreaded those three hours but I feel like it definitely paid off when I went to actually visit Viet Nam, you know?"
"Yeah, I wish I could speak Chinese, especially when I visit China. It sucks to not be able to talk to my grandmother or uncles."
At this point, I could hear the hurt of having this barrier of communication between his grandmother, a woman whom his father would talk so much about. His voice broke when he spoke of this inability to talk to them. I tried to shy away from this sadness but I still wanted to know more on the language struggle because it was evocative and emotional. I decided to ask him if he wanted to learn Chinese (to possibly break this barrier).
"Would you have any interests in learning Chinese in the future?"
"I believe learning is a life-long process and if I found the chance to learn conversational Chinese, I would. Writing is way too hard."
"Yes! I totally understand. Writing Chinese is practically writing hieroglyphics!" After some laughter, I continued on the conversation with a different subtopic. "I have family in Asia too, specifically Viet Nam. With other first generation Asians, I've had a similar background to theirs. I was wondering what was your parents', as well as your, story?"
"After finishing undergrad in China, my parents came to get their PhD in America. My mother went to Baylor and my father went to UMass. My mother was a nurse before she came to America. She had influences from her father, an army medic. My dad came from an impoverished home and was very lucky to go to America to finish schooling. My father constantly feels guilty to live in America while his brothers and mother are stuck in China so he visits often and sends money to subsidize costs. I have visited China a few times with my parents. Both of my parents speak fluent English but they speak both Chinese and English at home."
"My mom has a similar story as your father's. She definitely came from an impoverished family. She was working in rice fields when her older sisters went to school and they would alternate every other day. My mother was allowed to go to America because her father was a GI during the Vietnam War, but her older sisters weren't so lucky to have this opportunity so my mother tries her best to help them out. Because my mother had such a rough life, she definitely stresses hard work and taking advantage of all these resources in America. How do the values instilled in you by your parents differ from those of your American friends?"
"There is a huge emphasis on working hard because my dad came from an impoverish past and didn't have many opportunities; therefore, I should use as many opportunities as I can. There is also an emphasis on the children taking care of the parents. My dad is constantly worrying on his family back in China. I should return the same gratitude as he, as well as my mother, has provided so much for me. If my parents were born in America, they wouldn't have as strong a work ethic as they do now."
I know it's a ways away, but when you have children, will you stress the same values?"
"It's very important to remember your roots, your heritage, and where you came from. It's good to let your children know where your ancestors came from. I would be a lot different if my parents were born in America. I don't speak Chinese well but if I could redo my childhood, I would learn how to speak the language to communicate with my family back in China."
I thanked him for his time and went straight to my dorm to type up this enlightening interview. Each first generation child has parents that came to the States in search of this American Dream but everyone's journey, despite some similarities, are so different. My mom came here because she was able to escape the back-breaking labor and restart and gain a better life. Thomas's parents came to continue a greater education to have a better life.